beyond sublime

the sobering reminders in reality of how you can’t repeat the...

Mon, 13 May 2013 02:52:00 -0400

the sobering reminders in reality of how you can’t repeat the past,
yet how do i imagine future engagements to be as grandiose.
but there is something greater, a certain Hope far better of ahead
than those left behind for a reason.

when my heart was feeling empty and my soul devoid You answered me saying You are with me all the...

Wed, 08 May 2013 18:11:41 -0400

when my heart was feeling empty and my soul devoid
You answered me saying You are with me all the days of my life.
my soul is downcast within me, therefore i will remember You.
You spoke to me saying You will fill me with joy in Your presence
with eternal pleasures at Your right hand.

I was sinking deep in sin, far from the peaceful shore, Very...

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 18:58:00 -0400

I was sinking deep in sin, far from the peaceful shore,
Very deeply stained within, sinking to rise no more,
But the Master of the sea, heard my despairing cry,
From the waters lifted me, now safe am I.

Love lifted me! Love lifted me!
When nothing else could help
Love lifted me!

All my heart to Him I give, ever to Him I’ll cling
In His blessed presence live, ever His praises sing,
Love so mighty and so true, merits my soul’s best songs,
Faithful, loving service too, to Him belongs.

Souls in danger look above, Jesus completely saves,
He will lift you by His love, out of the angry waves.
He’s the Master of the sea, billows His will obey,
He your Savior wants to be, be saved today.

Jesus saves, Jesus saves He will lift you from the
Crashing waves, crashing waves He will never leave you

Love lifted me, love lifted me
When nothing else could help Love lifted me.

Photo

Sun, 14 Apr 2013 18:02:40 -0400

restoration The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because...

Sun, 07 Apr 2013 15:30:21 -0400

restoration
The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me,
because the Lord has anointed me
to bring good news to the poor
he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim liberty to the captives,
and the opening of the prison to those who are bound;
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor,
and the day of vengeance of our God;
to comfort all who mourn;
to grant to those who mourn in Zion—
to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness instead of mourning,
the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit;
that they may be called oaks of righteousness,
the planting of the Lord, that he may be glorified.

so what can i say Lord
i’ve been down here so long,
but thank You for finally carrying my heart out of the darkness
my freedom’s in Your blood
that Your perfect love covered a multitude of my sins
i was made to know You
i was made to worship You
it feels so good to be with You, to be what i was made for
and no longer to stray in the way of transgression
i turn to You Lord,
You are sovereign down to the every last bit of detail
so i entrust my life to You
i love You Lord, i fix my eyes on all that You are
my beautiful, beautiful Savior.

happily ever after

Sun, 31 Mar 2013 12:34:25 -0400

ever since watching once upon a time and when i reflect upon all that has happened to me in this past year’s season,
my musings of if my happily ever after will ever happen and what it would look like has been on playback in the abyss of my thoughts
but today i am reminded that my Knight in shining armor has already fought blood and flesh with His life for me as His bride and risen to conquer death itself
Good has already won
that as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her
that He might sanctify her,
having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word.
that i may be reconciled to the Prince of Peace.
i already have my happily ever after because He lives,
i have Hope Eternal
oh how the things of this world grow strangely dim now
oh how i appreciate You Jesus, oh how You love.

so often, so many times i am so weak to just fall flat into...

Fri, 29 Mar 2013 15:13:04 -0400

so often, so many times i am so weak to just fall flat into flesh
and seek/look for You in broken cisterns and empty idols
instead of coming to You the source of living water
and on this Good Friday, where You allowed me to kill You by my sins
how does my fickle and depraved being still think and act in a way that says
‘You’re not enough for me, for not being satisfied in You’
You died on the cross for me, You took upon Yourself the judgment, punishment, and death i deserved, that You stood in my place.
now how come my heart is still so ungrateful and still run like an adulteress?
i know that nothing good live sin me, that is, in my sinful nature. for i have the desire to do what is good, but i cannot carry it out.
woes me, for having killed the author of life, and having been spared from that death i deserved, still be so fickle and run to other idols in folly. what a wretched being i am! who will rescue me from this body of death? thanks be to God- through Jesus Christ my Lord!
thank You that You bought the gift of repentance with Your blood.
that i may have a chance to turn from my depravity and turn to You Jesus.
i’m so sorry for always choosing self over You,
thank You though that this is exactly why You went to the cross, so that i can be free and not be enslaved to the ways of man which lead to death, but choose the way of freedom in Christ.
i bring my sins at Your feet once again, for being consumed by my own evil desires and enticed to folly, fear, control, and letting idols take Your throne.
thank You that You paid the painful price in full, ransomed me from death.
i am unworthy, so unworthy Lord.
why would You still ask me to come and repent so that i may find rest for my soul in You?
because of Your great, abounding love, thank You for the grace i don’t deserve.
please wash me clean of these iniquities again.
thank You that in Your death, You ex-sponged my sins and cast them as far as the east is from the west. You love covers a multitude of my sins, as You bled to death in my place on that cross. thank You Savior, come take your rightful place in my heart, put to death the evil desires of my flesh which so rage in my weak soul,
make me stand firm in Your righteousness again please.
thank You that You are gentle and humble in heart to me. the wretched sinner i am, while You are perfection.
as You were put to death by my sin, yet conquered it with Your Great Love,
as there is no resurrections without death first, i put to death my flesh, Spirit reign in me.
i can say it is still well with my soul because You gently welcome the weakest things in me
i take off the yoke of slavery, and take up Your yoke for me.
Wonderful love, You died for me.

though my world is in shambles You walk with me through the valley of the shadow of death You lead...

Wed, 27 Mar 2013 16:29:33 -0400

though my world is in shambles
You walk with me through the valley of the shadow of death
You lead me beside quiet waters
You restore my soul
i fix my eyes on You, Jesus.

when sin looks more enjoyable than God.

Wed, 20 Mar 2013 16:19:02 -0400

when sin looks more enjoyable than God.

what does it matter if i gain the whole world and lose my soul what does it matter if i can raise...

Sat, 16 Mar 2013 14:32:00 -0400

what does it matter if i gain the whole world and lose my soul
what does it matter if i can raise the dead, but You don’t know me
i wanna be a lover, make me a lover God
what does it matter if i give all to the poor, but i give You nothing
what does it matter if i’m busy with good things, but my love for You is fading

teach me to abide in You, teach me how to bear much fruit

if worship is like perfume i’ll pour mine out on You i...

Mon, 11 Mar 2013 22:59:10 -0400

if worship is like perfume
i’ll pour mine out on You

i yield my heart to You, all i am
all to You, i surrender
only You have all i need, only You can satisfy

no turning back
i’ve made up my mind
Your love makes it worth it all

learning authenticity

Wed, 27 Feb 2013 20:12:00 -0500

tears of understanding and joy rolled down my face as i was driving home from dinner tonight as 8tracks started playing hillsong’s all i need is You
coming from a meal where God used the conversation to directly minister and speak the Gospel into this current season of my life
He encouraged me today so many times to show me that i am not alone
and that the Spirit does truly reside in me and is moving
truly all i really need is You, You hold the universe and everyone on earth in Your hand
just all the while more recently i had been pondering upon
the theology of suffering and how to suffer well,
to know that the Lord loves me so much to put me through hardship, trials, pain, and loss
so that i can get to know Him that much more, on such an intimate level where no one else could have walked through the situation with the Lord in
and in the hurtfulness of it all,
it is when He can mirror and reflect to me my ugliness and sin while concurrently revealing His righteousness
and how He wants to redeem me into His masterpiece
and in sanctification, i am so thankful that God has bestowed on me His blessed mercy and allowed me to be sensitive and willing to be self-perceiving as to look into that dark pool of depravity and folly that is my dead heart that He is bringing back to life with the Spirit testifying and convicting me out of His grace and care
that i can say looking back at the tunnel that it was because He loved me to the core of my being and soul
that He brought so much pain upon my life
and that He is fully capable and big enough to handle me going out at night and just screaming in anger at the moon
i think that God would rather have me do that
and be authentic and real than to stuff my emotions to run and hide
it’s easy to love when things are good
but He has called me to love the hard to love and unlovable
embracing that hardship as taking up my cross
that i can trust that He will take care of me and surrender to His plan
the Lord does not cause pain without something new to be reborn
and so in the end it is a privilege to be given more trials reflecting that He knows the capacity of which i can handle so that i may cleave and cling onto Him in trial and temptation
and so this is what it’s like to have a tiny sliver of joy in suffering and loss.

long live the King of hearts, divine romance

Fri, 15 Feb 2013 21:17:25 -0500

A Valentine may play a love song for you,
but God sings you the sweetest love song in the universe.

“The Lord your God…will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.”
ZEPHANIAH 3:17

A Valentine may give you flowers,
but God sent you the most beautiful rose of all, Jesus.

“I am the rose of Sharon, and the lily of the valleys.”
SONG OF SOLOMON 2:1

A Valentine may take you out to dinner,
but God has invited you
to the most amazing feast ever given.

“Blessed are those who are called
to the marriage supper of the Lamb!”
REVELATION 19:9

A Valentine may bring you chocolate,
but God provides you with something even sweeter,
His Word.

“How sweet are your words to my taste,
sweeter than honey to my mouth!”
PSALM 119:103

A Valentine may love you for a lifetime,
but God loved you before you were born
and will love you for all eternity!

“Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love.”
JEREMIAH 31:3

oh praise the One who paid my debts and raise this life up from the dead. though i publicly...

Sun, 10 Feb 2013 12:42:00 -0500

oh praise the One who paid my debts
and raise this life up from the dead.
though i publicly announce, like peter,
my loyalty and love for You
i am so prone to quietly deny You in my private life.
thank You Lord Jesus for revealing my pride, folly, and self-righteousness
and for showing me how abundant, complete, and gracious Your love is though
You who daily reinstates me to Your mission though i deny You so often
how You are God and i am a sinner,
yet You still ask me- do you truly love, agape, Me
yet i can only say Lord You know all things;
You know i love, phileo, You
only imperfectly, full of mistake,
yet thank You that You still meet me where i’m at
and say to me, if You really do, then follow me,
even though You will experience hardship, trial, and pain
the joy You find in loving Me will make You strong to withstand
and behold Me as Your greatest love, highest calling, and ultimate treasure.

i love the way You love like no other it’s got nothing to...

Thu, 07 Feb 2013 17:34:50 -0500

i love the way You love like no other
it’s got nothing to do with anything that i do
time and time again You forgive me
so this time i choose to stay here with You

hold me
pull me just a little bit closer
i don’t wanna lose this moment
Your love has covered me
and now i can’t get over You
i can’t get over You
i can’t get over You
i just can’t get over You

here in the arms of my Father
only grace can be found
so i lay my fears down
nothing is the same anymore
You’ve changed me from the inside out
now my heart is beating and it’s singing, won’t You

i can’t get over the way
Your love stays the same, oh Lord
i can’t get over the way
Your love stays the same, oh Lord

even through the good and the bad times
You stay the same
so my song will remain
Lord

i can’t get over You
i can’t get over You
there’s nothing i can’t do
i just can’t get over You

i can’t get over You

broken and trampled in dirt how ugly and appalling are my sins that i’m in disbelief of...

Thu, 31 Jan 2013 23:24:19 -0500

broken and trampled in dirt
how ugly and appalling are my sins
that i’m in disbelief of myself
in facing the depths and realities of transgression
i want to lie in my grave, letting go of my denial
as the curtains are parted, this reflects how i really am
in total depravity without His grace

i am a crooked soul trying to stand up straight
when i try on my own
i only find myself more bent and even more flawed
only when i relinquish all control
that You can truly be my Redeemer
You trim and shape me
like an oak tree, enrooted in layers of tilled and toiled soil
building and renewing the layers of earth
and stitching up wounds and forming battle scars
displaying the splendor of joy in suffering.

You glean the good out of Your daily grace
beautiful things from the dusty ashes
flowers and fruit from the weeds
to take firm grasps of the seed of the Gospel
this is my Life song
praise in the storm
strength in battle
hope in future glory
i am a tree bending beneath the weight of Your love
You are the Gardener
let me abide in the Vine.

"i know, O Lord, that Your rules are righteous,and that in faithfulness You have afflicted me. let..."

Fri, 25 Jan 2013 15:47:12 -0500

“i know, O Lord, that Your rules are righteous,
and that in faithfulness You have afflicted me.
let Your steadfast love comfort me
according to Your promise to Your servant.
let Your mercy come to me, that i may live;
for Your law is my delight.”

- psalm 119:75–77

I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. this is what the Sovereign Lord says: come...

Fri, 11 Jan 2013 18:32:19 -0500

I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life.
this is what the Sovereign Lord says:
come from the four winds, o breath,
and breath into these slain, that they may live.
I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them;
I will put my Spirit in you and you will live.
then you will know that I AM the Lord.

please Holy Spirit come, fill up
the hurt, empty, broken, barren, dry, and desperate
places and corners of my heart where sin has laid rampant,
clean me out and fill me up so that i may abide in You, the Vine.
for apart from You i can do nothing.

please forgive me that so often i’ve only desired Your benefits,
reducing You down to a genie or errand boy psychologist
and have become blinded by my own selfish consumerism
that i could no longer see the power of You as my Messiah and Lord.
sit enthroned upon my heart Lord, let Your love light Your presence,
please be merciful, and allow me to experience the depths of Your grace again
so that i would have no other, than Jesus Christ,
as my Lord and Savior, supremacy in my heart,
so that You are most treasured and glorified as my Christ.

when joy’s heart breaks, it’s because joy feels...

Thu, 10 Jan 2013 16:42:23 -0500

when joy’s heart breaks, it’s because joy feels free
and safe enough to embrace everything, even the feeling of falling to pieces.

"You are my Lord; apart from You i have no good thing."

Fri, 04 Jan 2013 01:09:26 -0500

“You are my Lord; apart from You i have no good thing.”